Category: Awareness

Self-harm (Noun).  The act of purposely hurting oneself as an emotional coping mechanism.  March is Self-Harm Awareness Month.  This dedicated month aims to raise awareness about self-harm, breaking the stigma, and providing support and hope to those who have or currently struggle with it.

Self-harm is also known as nonsuicidal self-injury or NSSI.  It describes the act of purposely harming oneself, usually as a way to cope with difficult or stressing thoughts and feelings.  The most common act of injury is cutting with a sharp object.  Some people also cause burns, pull out hair, and pick at wounds to prevent healing.  Extreme injuries can also result in broken bones.  I’m ashamed to say it, but I have done some of those in the past.  But I am also very proud to say, that I am one year free of cutting on my journey!  With support, I have lessened my harmful urges, learned to manage my emotions and have developed safer coping mechanisms.  My scars act as an incentive to stay focused and to keep going on my road to recovery!

Self-harm is not a mental illness, but rather a behavior.  There are several illnesses associated with self-harm, including anxiety, depression, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, and posttraumatic stress disorder.  It is not usually meant as a suicide attempt, but it is a harmful way to cope with emotional pain, sadness, anger, and stress, and should be taken seriously.  Life-threatening injuries are usually not intended, but if someone is hurting themself, they may be at an increased risk for more serious injury.

Self-harm mostly happens in private and is done in a controlled manner or the same way each time.  It often leaves a pattern on the skin.  Some examples of self-harm include:

• Cutting, scratching or stabbing with a sharp object.
• Burning with matches, cigarettes, or heated, sharp objects such as knives.
• Carving words or symbols on the skin.
• Self hitting, punching, biting or head banging.
• Piercing the skin or inserting objects under the skin.

The arms, legs, chest and belly are the most frequent targets of self-injury, but any area of the body can be injured.  Some symptoms of self-harm may include:

• Scars, fresh cuts, scratches, bruises, bite marks or other wounds.
• Excessive rubbing of an area to create a burn.
• Wearing long sleeves or long pants to hide injury, even in hot weather.
• Frequent reports of accidental injury.
• Difficulties in relationships or a change in behaviors that are impulsive, intense, and unexpected.
• Talk of helplessness, hopelessness or worthlessness.

If you’re injuring yourself, or if you have thoughts of harming yourself, please reach out for help.  Any sign of self-injury is a sign of bigger stressors that need attention.  You can start by talking to someone you trust, such as a friend, family member, or your primary care physician.  They can help you take the first steps to successful treatment.  While you may feel ashamed and embarrassed about your behavior, you can find support from people who aren’t going to judge you.  If you have a friend or family member who is self-harming, gently express your concern and encourage the person to seek medical or mental health treatment.  The 988 Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States.  Call, text, or chat online.  There is always hope for healing and recovery!

Here is a list of library materials and other online resources that may be helpful:

• Dealing With Self-Injury Disorder by Tammy Gagne.
• How Not To Fall Apart: Lessons Learned on the Road From Self-Harm To Self-Care by Maggy Van Eijk.
• Self-Injury: The Ultimate Teen Guide by Judy Dodge Cummings.
• HelpGuide: Your Trusted Guide To Mental Health and Wellness
• NAMI – National Alliance on Mental Illness
• SAMHSA – Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration

Until next time, stay happy, healthy, and safe! ~Sally~

February.  The month dedicated to love.  Whether you celebrate with hearts, flowers, or candy, love is in the air.  But it is not just about romance.  It is about loving yourself, loving others, and having healthy relationships with family and friends.  Today, February 13th, is Self Love Day.  It is an annual celebration to appreciate and understand the importance of self-love.  In my post from last month, one of the goals I listed was to learn to love yourself more.  Rather than focusing on the bad things, drop the habit of judging yourself harshly and start celebrating the good things.  When our mental health is down, we become our own worst critics.  Make sure you find ways to love yourself and get that boost of self esteem.  Self love does not happen overnight.  Yes, you may struggle.  But as you move forward on your journey, you can look back and see how you paved the path to better mental health and overall well being.

So, how exactly does one go about loving themselves more?  We have to stop being so mean.  Grant yourself the kindness you grant others.  Speak to yourself as you would with a friend.  If you constantly beat yourself up, it can make you feel helpless, worthless, and less motivated.  Boost that self confidence by giving yourself a compliment.  Train yourself to focus on the positives.  Write them in a journal or put a post it on a mirror.  Positive affirmations are a great way to demonstrate self love.  Part of practicing self love is learning to extend compassion and kindness to ourselves.

Next, take care of yourself and prioritize what’s important.  Sounds basic enough, right?  Eat healthy.  Drink plenty of water.  Get some exercise.  Just start small and imagine what you would tell a child to do.  Feeling tired?  Get some extra sleep and try to eat a little better.  Is your body stiff and out of shape?  Incorporate more activity or a routine exercise program.  We are often convinced that we are too busy because we all have responsibilities.  Think of the things that are most important to you and make more time for them in your life.

And finally, celebrate the little victories and find support if you need it.  Set expectations for yourself and work really hard to meet those standards.  But don’t beat yourself up when you don’t.  Minor accomplishments add up and create momentum for reaching the end goal.  Focus on yourself and stop comparing yourself to others.  Self love is a lifelong practice and some days will be better than others.  Reaching out to the people in your life that you trust and feel comfortable with can help you on your journey.  Loving yourself has mental and physical health benefits.  It’ll take time, but you just might learn to appreciate a whole new side of yourself.

Until next time, stay happy, healthy, safe, and practice self love!  ~Sally~

NEW YEAR, NEW YOU!

Well, here we are.  2023 is behind us and 2024 has begun.  Are you someone who sets New Year’s resolutions?  A New Year’s resolution is a tradition in which a person resolves to continue good practices, change an undesired trait or behavior, accomplish a personal goal, or otherwise improve their behavior at the beginning of a calendar year.  Maybe you use another term, like intentions.  I like to use the term goal setting.  And I am definitely a “to do list” person.  It not only makes me feel more organized, but it also helps me focus on the goals I set and (try to) accomplish them in a timely manner.  And if I don’t accomplish a certain goal, I know that I am still moving forward in my journey.  Progress is progress, no matter what speed you go.

When it comes to your mental health journey, some of your goals could be as simple as regulating your sleep schedule or establishing a routine.  Not getting enough sleep can make it harder for you to deal with stress and emotions.  Make getting proper rest a priority.  Most adults need about 7 to 8 hours of good-quality sleep per night.

Another mental health goal is making a commitment to prioritize self-care.  Take time for yourself so you can address your own needs, reduce stress, and pursue a balanced and healthy lifestyle.  Dedicate time each day or week to engage in activities that you enjoy.  This can include pampering yourself, going out to a movie, or maybe making no plans and just simply reading a book.  Reading is like exercise for the mind and is both a distraction and can provide new perspectives.

Here is a list of some mental health goals that you may want to focus on during 2024!

• Gratitude.  This can include keeping a journal or simply taking a few moments each day to acknowledge the things you are thankful for.  One of my goals is to create a “Joy Jar” and write an entry each week.  Then at the end of 2024, I can empty the jar and reflect on the wonderful things that I have encountered during the year.
• Learn a hobby or something new.  A growing mind is healthier than a stagnant mind. Learning is like cardio for the brain; new neural connections are forming and existing connections are being strengthened. As you learn, there is also an opportunity to engage with other individuals that have common interests.
• Identify stressors, develop coping mechanisms for stress, and overcoming mental obstacles.  A mental health professional can help you learn to better identify and track your stressors or triggers, and how to cope moving forward.  You can use coping strategies to manage or reduce your stress and emotions.  Therapy/counseling looks different for every person, but clients often start therapy with the intention of working through something difficult to come out on the other side feeling relief.
• Journaling.   Journal daily about triggers and how to combat them.  Journaling is a good way to cultivate a greater sense of direction and context for your day-to-day life.  When we fail to reflect on where we’ve been, who we are, and where we’re going, life can begin to feel meaningless.
• Meditation.  A powerful tool to improve your mental health.  Focus your attention on the present moment.  Experiment with different techniques and you will eventually find one that works for you and gives you that much needed lift.
• Learn to love yourself more.  When our mental health is down, we become our worst critics.  Make sure that you find ways to love yourself.  Practice self appreciation to boost your self esteem.  Rather than focusing on the bad things, drop the habit of judging yourself harshly and start celebrating the good things.

So as you venture into the year 2024, make your mental health a priority!  You don’t have to accomplish these goals all at once, or even step too far outside of your comfort zone to do so.  But little steps will eventually lead to big results!  And don’t ever be afraid to ask for help.  If you find yourself struggling mentally, reach out.  Start with your primary care physician or research therapists and counselors in your area.  I have been using therapy and medication for my anxiety and depression for over a year and it is the best thing I have done to help me get back on track!  It isn’t always easy, but it is a great feeling knowing there is always hope!

Until next time, stay happy, healthy, and safe! ~Sally~

Wow!  I can’t believe it’s almost the end of December and a new year is just around the corner!  I hope everyone is able to enjoy some time with family and friends this holiday season. Goodbye 2023. Hello 2024.

With the holidays and the change of season can come a mixed bag of emotions.  For some, it is a time for joy and connecting with friends and loved ones.  For others, it can be stressful and especially challenging if you are impacted with mental illness.  Many people go through periods when they feel sad or unlike their usual selves.  Sometimes, these mood changes begin and end when the seasons change.  If you have noticed significant changes in your mood and behavior when the seasons change, you may be experiencing Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as SAD.

SAD is a type of depression characterized by a recurrent seasonal pattern, with symptoms lasting 4-5 months out of the year.  The signs and symptoms of SAD include those associated with depression, as well as disorder-specific symptoms that differ from winter-pattern and summer-pattern SAD.  Not every person with SAD experiences the depression symptoms listed below.  To learn more about the signs and symptoms of depression, visit the National Institute of Mental Health.

Symptom of depression can include:

• Persistent sad, anxious or empty mood most of the day, nearly every day, for at least 2 weeks.
• Feelings of hopelessness or pessimism, irritability, frustration or restlessness, guilt, worthlessness or helplessness.
• Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies or activities.
• Decreased energy, fatigue, or feeling slowed down.
• Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions.
• Changes in sleep or appetite or unplanned weight changes.
• Physical aches, pains or digestive problems that do not have a clear cause and do not go away with treatment.
• Thoughts of death and suicide or suicide attempts.

For winter-pattern SAD, additional symptoms can include:

• Oversleeping.
• Overeating, particularly craving carbohydrates, leading to weight gain.
• Social withdrawal or hibernating.

For summer-pattern SAD, additional symptoms can include:

• Trouble sleeping.
• Poor appetite, leading to weight loss.
• Restlessness or agitation, and anxiety.
• Violent and aggressive behavior.

Winter-pattern SAD should not be confused with the holiday blues, which are feelings of sadness or anxiety brought on by stresses at certain times of year.  The depression associated with SAD is related to changes in daylight hours, not the calendar, so stresses associated with the holidays are not the same as SAD.

For more information on the cause, diagnosis, treatment, and prevention of Seasonal Affective Disorder, please visit the National Institute of Mental Health – Seasonal Affective Disorder.

If you or someone you know is struggling or having thoughts of suicide, call, text, or chat with the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988. In life-threatening situations, call 911.

Stay happy, healthy, and safe!  ~Sally~

Depression.  (A) A mood disorder that is marked by varying degrees of sadness, despair, and loneliness and that is typically accompanied by inactivity, guilt, lack of concentration, social withdrawal, sleep disturbances, and sometimes suicidal tendencies.  (B) A lowering of physical or mental vitality or of functional activity.

National Depression and Mental Health Screening Month is a time to prioritize our mental health, de-stigmatize discussions about it, and ensure that everyone has access to the care and support they need. It’s a reminder that our mental health is just as vital as our physical health and that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Depression is one of the most common mental illnesses, affecting more than 16 million American adults each year.  People suffering from depression often experience some of these key symptoms:

• A persistent sad, anxious, or empty mood.
• Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed.
• Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions.
• Fatigue or loss of energy.
• Sleeping too little or too much.
• Reduced appetite and weight loss, or increased appetite and weight gain.
• Restlessness of irritability
• Thoughts of death or suicide.

Like screenings for other illnesses, depression screenings should be a routine part of healthcare.  Clinical depression is a serious medical illness and can lead to suicide.  It affects men and women of all ages and races.  Sometimes people with depression mistakenly believe that their symptoms are a normal part of life.  Depression can co-occur and complicate other medical conditions.  Only about one third of those suffering from severe depression seek treatment from a mental health professional.

Screenings are not a professional diagnosis. Screenings point out the presence or absence of symptoms and provide a referral for further evaluation, if needed. You should see your doctor or a qualified mental health professional if you experience five or more of the above symptoms for longer than two weeks or if the symptoms are severe enough to interfere with your daily routine. Please visit Mental Health America Screening Tools to take a quick and easy test. Mental health conditions, like depression and anxiety, are real, common, and treatable. And recovery is possible!

Until next month, stay happy, healthy, and safe! ~Sally~

September is here and that means Suicide Prevention Awareness Month is upon us.  It’s a cause that is very near and dear to my heart and one that I will always advocate for.  It is a month to remember the lives lost, the millions of people who struggle, and those that have been impacted.  Although mental health and suicide prevention is important to address year-round, this month provides a dedicated time for people, organizations, and communities to join their voices and share that there is HOPE, HELP is available, and HEALING is possible!

The theme of this post is CONNECTION. According to the CDC, connectedness may protect against suicidal behaviors. Connection decreases isolation and encourages healthy coping behaviors. Connection can be found within oneself, within relationships, and within community.

CONNECTION FOR OURSELVES. Connection is not just nice to have, but it is essential to health and well-being. People with meaningful social connections have less stress, better sleep, healthier habits and behaviors, a sense of belonging, and better overall health that can lead to a longer life. Connecting can be as deep as a heart-to-heart conversation, or as simple as sharing a “hello” and a smile. Meaningful connections come from people like family members, friends, neighbors and co-workers. Connection can look like someone willing to help you with a task or someone who listens and validates your feelings. Maybe someone can give you a different perspective than your own or provide advice and support for something you are struggling with. While there are no official guidelines to forming new connections, here are some suggestions for finding and fostering connection with others.

• Start a conversation. Talk to people that you already know and build upon that relationship. Take the time to authentically get to know your co-workers.
• Join a club or enroll in a class that intrigues you. The people that will be there will already share a common interest with you.
• Get involved in your community. Attend events and do things that you have not tried before.
• Explore opportunities to serve and help others. Many organizations offer volunteer opportunities that can give you the chance to contribute to something that you find important.

Sometimes it is hard to know when you need to connect with someone to support you with your mental health. Seek help during times of struggle with loneliness or isolation by reaching out to a friend, a family member, a health care provider or by using the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

CONNECTING WITH LOVED ONES. If someone you know is struggling emotionally or having a hard time, connecting with them can be the difference in getting them the help they need. Talking to a loved one about mental health and suicide can be uncomfortable, but it is also one of the best ways to prevent it. We can all take action to have these conversations with someone who may be suicidal by using these five action steps from #BeThe1To.

• Ask. Findings suggest that acknowledging and talking about suicide may reduce suicidal ideation.
• Keep them safe. Knowing the answers to the questions can tell us about the imminence and severity of danger the person is in.
• Be there. Connecting and limiting their isolation has shown to be a protective factor against suicide.
• Help them connect. Work with them to develop a safety plan to guide them through crisis, keep them safe, and get them help.
• Stay connected. Make sure to follow up with them to see how they’re doing. This is a great time to see if there is anything else that you can do to support them.

CONNECTING WITH COMMUNITY. While we trust our closest friends, family and loved ones, the broader community where we live, work and play also contribute to our feeling of connection. Communities can provide us with an emotional connection with people who share similar experiences. It can also bring a feeling of belonging, a sense of support, and a way to have our voices heard and valued by a wider group of people. Surrounding people and families with neighborhoods, businesses, and services is a critical way to support every person. Communities that work collectively in an intentional and proactive way is vital to creating the changes needed to increase social connectedness and belonging.

While formal programs and policies can be impactful, the norms and culture of how we engage one another, significantly influence social connection. In addition to this culture, here are additional ideas that organizations and communities can consider.

• Cultivate values of kindness, respect, service, and commitment to one another.
• Model connection values in positions of leadership and influence.
• Create opportunities and spaces for social connection.
• Offer community-based education, skill-building classes, and encourage attendance at social events and volunteerism.
• Actively seek and build partnerships with a variety of community institutions, like schools, health organizations, and workplaces. This can create a culture of connection with the broader community and support those who may be struggling with isolation, their mental health, or having thoughts of suicide.
• Know what supports are available for people who need it and provide resources and support to promote mental health and well-being and prevent suicide.
• Expand conversations on the importance of social connections where we live, work, learn and play.

CONNECTION TO HOPE AND HEALING. When your mental health is off, it is important to find the help that is right for you. Finding hope and healing can be found in many places and comes in many forms to give you the type of support that you need. People you already have a connection with is often a good place to start. This could be your friends and family, a co-worker, your primary care doctor, or someone else that you can trust. Sometimes it is nice to know you are not alone in your struggle. Having peer support can be a great way to connect with others that may have similar experiences as you. If you are unsure about what to do and need to talk to someone, try a local or national phone line to get assistance. This could be calling one of Minnesota’s warm lines or attending a support group. They have trained counselors available to speak with you or your loved one and assist. Professional help can make a big difference, but sometimes it is hard to know where to start. Ask for referrals from your family, friends, physician, or other people you trust. Another starting point is to call the number on the back of your insurance card. They can help you identify what providers are a part of your plan.

People finding hope and healing is happening every single day. Exploring stories of how others have found hope and healing can also be a powerful way to learn how others have found ways to cope with life’s struggles. Even if you’re not sure that you would benefit from help, it can’t hurt to explore your different possibilities.

Until next month, stay happy, healthy and safe! ~Sally~

Better late than never!  It took me way too long to prepare an August post, but I’m back!  You would think someone who has been on a mental health journey for more than half her life, and writing about it for nearly three years, would have no trouble at all finding a topic for this month’s blog post.  Well, not this gal.  My brain is either frazzled with anxiety, foggy with depression, or all of the above and wants to shut down completely.  The struggle is absolutely real and you are never alone when it comes to your mental health journey.

I took the month of July off to sort of re-group and get back into the blogging groove.  In June, I wrote about grief and your mental health.  That’s pretty much what my July was filled with.  Grief.  The intense pain and sadness while mourning the loss of my best friend was almost unbearable, and really took a toll on my mental health and well-being.  If you are local, you may know that the community of Pipestone lost a young, forty-five year old wife and mother of six children to Metastatic Breast Cancer.  She was diagnosed after her very first mammogram at the age of forty and fought the disease for almost five years.  Although there was no cure, her treatments prolonged her life as long as she could tolerate.  She had amazing strength and will forever be loved and missed!

That brings me to this month’s mental health check in post.  August is National Wellness Month, or also called Self-Awareness Month.  This month is observed to remind us to promote healthy routines, manage our stress, and focus on self-care.  It is the perfect time to focus on taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally.  These three things will definitely go hand in hand.  If you are thriving with one, you are more than likely thriving with all.  But a simple setback, either physical or emotional, can really alter your mental clarity.

Let’s start with promoting healthy routines.  There is a long list of things we do on a daily basis that can be overwhelming.  Whether it is working, grocery shopping, cleaning, making sure you get the kids to school and practices on time, or even just getting enough sleep.  (Does anyone else do the “If I fall asleep right now, I’ll get this much sleep” math at night?)  There seems to never be enough time during the day and it can feel impossible to finish every task.  And if you already struggle with a mental health concern, like depression or anxiety, it can be even harder to take care of yourself.  Here are some tips for success from Mental Health America.  They also have a PDF from Tools 2 Thrive for Creating Healthy Routines.

• Create a routine that is right for you.  We don’t all have the same schedules and some of us struggle with certain parts of our day more than others.  Your routine may not be exactly the same every day, but all routines should include eating a nutritious diet, exercise, and getting enough sleep.
• Start small.  Changing your routine all at once probably won’t get lasting results.  Small changes add up.  It could be just adding something new and positive, or cutting out a bad habit.
• Make swaps.  Take away something that isn’t so healthy and swap it for a better behavior.  Do you feel sluggish in the afternoon and find yourself eating sugary snacks?  Try taking a brisk walk to get your blood pumping and your endorphins flowing.
• Plan ahead.  When life gets hectic, try doing things like meal prepping or picking out an outfit the night before work.  If you can’t make it to the gym, try a home workout instead.
• Reward yourself for small victories.  Set goals and celebrate when you reach them.  Have you worked out every day as planned?  Treat yourself!
• Don’t beat yourself up if you miss a day.  Making changes is hard and you might forget to do something new once in a while.  You don’t have to be perfect, just try to do better the next day.

Next is managing stress.  Stress affects your entire body, both mentally and physically.  But when stress is intense and frequent, it can strain your body and make it impossible to function.  Some common signs include headaches, trouble sleeping, mood swings, difficulty concentrating, and feeling overwhelmed.  Stress can contribute to worsening symptoms of your mental illness.  Knowing your triggers is the first step in coping with this experience.  Everyone has their own threshold.  Once you’ve learned what your triggers are, experiment with coping strategies.  Here are some ways to reduce stress from NAMI.

• Accept your needs.  Recognize what situations make you physically and mentally agitated.  Once you know this, you can avoid them when possible.
• Practice relaxation.  Take a break to refocus.  Deep breathing, meditation, and relaxation are good ways to calm yourself.
• Set aside time for yourself.  Schedule something that makes you feel good.  It might be a movie, a massage, or even just reading a book.
• Eat well.  Well-balanced and nutritious, like whole grains, vegetables, and fresh fruit.
• Get enough sleep.  Symptoms of some mental health conditions can be triggered by getting too little sleep.
• Avoid alcohol and drugs.  They don’t actually reduce stress.  In fact, it often will worsen it.
• Talk to someone.  Whether to family, friends, a counselor, or a support group, airing out and talking can help.

And finally, self-care.  Take the time to do things that help you improve both your physical and mental health.  Even small acts of self-care can have a big impact.  Here are some tips from the National Institute of Mental Health to help you get started.

• Get regular exercise.
• Eat healthy, regular meals and stay hydrated.
• Make sleep a priority.
• Try a relaxing activity.
• Set goals and priorities.
• Practice gratitude.
• Focus on positivity.
• Stay connected.

Self-care looks different for everybody.  It may take trial and error to find what works best for you.  Although self-care is not a cure for mental illnesses, understanding your symptoms and coping techniques can help you manage your mental health.  Don’t wait until your symptoms are overwhelming.  If you are experiencing severe or distressing symptoms, seek help.  Talk about your concerns with your primary care provider and they can refer you to a mental health professional, if needed.

Stay tuned for a September check in for National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month.  In the meantime, stay happy, healthy, and safe! ~Sally~

It’s June.  School is out and the kids are on the go.  Summer activities are in full swing.  Vacations and holiday gatherings are being planned.  Pools are crowded with people cooling off in the heat.  Lakes are busy with swimming, boating, and fishing.  Campgrounds are bustling with outdoor activities.  Lots of fun and relaxing in the sun.  Summer is finally here.

For some, it may not be all fun in the sun.  For some, it will be filled with tears and memories or thoughts of what might have been.  The could’ve, would’ve, should’ve that never came about.  Anniversaries or birthdays without someone you will never forget. 

This month I am writing about grief and what it can do to your mental health and well-being.  The loss of a loved one is heartbreaking and can cause you to experience a long list of emotions.  This could include shock, confusion, sadness, or even anger.  Whether the death was expected or not, these feelings are all part of the mourning process and are common reactions to loss.  If you are coping with a loss, you may not be prepared for the intensity and duration of emotions or the changing of moods.  Some often question their mental stability, but just know that these feelings are appropriate and can help you come to terms with the loss.  It takes time, but coping with death is essential to a healthy mind, body, and spirit.

Coping is a process and the extent of mourning will depend on the individual, the type of loss, and the void left by that loss.  When pain and sadness worsen over time, grief can have an intense effect on one’s physical and mental health.  Prolonged, chronic grief can lead to a complicated bereavement or grief disorder.  The symptoms can be intensive and can include constant focus on the loss, problems with daily routine, and withdrawal or separation from family and friends.

Diagnosing a grief disorder can be difficult.  If you have a history of depression, anxiety or substance abuse, you are at an increased risk of developing a grief disorder.  There are many similarities between complicated grief and depression, but there are also distinct differences. In some cases, clinical depression and complicated grief occur together. Getting the correct diagnosis is essential for treatment, so a comprehensive medical and psychological exam is often done.  Your doctor or mental health professional considers your particular symptoms and circumstances in determining what treatment is likely to work best for you.  This can include psychotherapy or medication.  Antidepressants may be helpful in people who have clinical depression as well as complicated grief.

Although it’s important to get professional treatment for complicated grief, here are some key strategies that may help you cope:

• Stick to your treatment plan.  Attend therapy appointments as scheduled and take medications, if needed, as directed.
• Practice stress management.  Unmanaged stress can lead to depression, overeating, and other unhealthy thoughts and behaviors.
• Take care of yourself.  Get rest, eat healthy, and take time to relax.  Regular exercise and physical activity can help relieve stress, anxiety, and depression.  Don’t turn to alcohol or recreational drugs to cope.
• Socialize.  Stay connected to the people that care about you.  They can offer support, a shoulder to cry on, or shared laughter to give you a little boost.
• Plan ahead for special dates or anniversaries.  These can trigger painful reminders of your loved one.  Find new ways to celebrate or reminisce about your loved one to provide you comfort and hope.
• Join a support group.  Over time, you may find shared experiences comforting and you may form meaningful new relationships.

Grief is definitely a long, winding road and a difficult journey to be on.  It is not a feeling that you will experience for a set amount of time.  It is a complex set of multiple emotions and feelings that will continue for the rest of your life.  People tend to believe that grief shrinks over time.  What really happens is that we grow around our grief.  I will end with a photo that has helped me during my journey.  It was shared in one of my online support groups.

Stay happy, healthy, and safe!

~Sally~

Survivor. (noun) A person who survives, especially a person remaining alive after an event in which others have died. The remainder of a group of people or things. A person who copes well with difficulties in their life.

Fighter. (noun) A boxer. An aircraft designed to seek out and destroy enemy aircraft in the air and to protect bomber aircraft. A person who fights, struggles, resists, etc. A person with the will, courage, determination, ability, or disposition to fight, struggle, resist, etc. An animal, as a dog, trained to fight or having the disposition to fight.

Advocate. (noun) A person who publicly supports or recommends a particular cause or policy. (verb) Publicly recommend or support.

With Mental Health Awareness Month coming to an end, I wanted to introduce myself. My name is Sally Whittle and I am the face and voice of mental health here at Meinders Library. Why, you ask? Because I am all three of those things listed above. I am a survivor because I was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety, and for many years, my brain was trying to kill me. I am a fighter because I still struggle with symptoms that make my daily living a rollercoaster and I sometimes can’t function. I am an advocate because I am raising awareness about mental health. Doing so can make the difference in the life of someone struggling and can also save lives.

Let’s recap the messages from this month. Week one was Mental Health Matters. There are many things that can fuel stigma around mental illness. That can make people ignore their mental health or make it harder for them to reach out for help. Some mental health conditions are invisible and you wouldn’t know the person is struggling without asking and having a conversation. Mental health matters and so do you!

Week two was Self Care. Remember, taking care of your mind is just as important as taking care of your body. Make self-care a priority. When it comes to mental health, self-care can help us manage stress, lower the risk of illness, and increase energy. Even small acts of self-care in our daily routine can have a big impact. Something as simple as a walk or chatting with a friend can make a huge difference.

Week three was Finding Help. There is no shame in seeking help for your mental health. It’s OK to not be OK. Start by talking with family and friends, or establishing care with your family doctor. If the problems in your life are stopping you from functioning well or feeling good, professional help can make a difference. It may save your life. Just know you are not alone, there is help available, and healing is possible.

Week four was Supporting Someone Else. Everyone can play a role in supporting mental health. If you notice someone may be struggling or having a hard time, ask “How are you?” and encourage honest answers. This provides the opportunity for others to share and feel heard. Often, just talking about it can be the first step in staying connected and helping get the support or treatment needed.

I hope my posts have helped spread awareness and spark conversation on this important and very stigmatized topic. As a way to promote mental health awareness year-round, I will be posting on a related topic once a month. If there is a specific topic you would like me to cover, please leave a comment or send an email to pipestonelibrary@yahoo.com and I will consider your request. In the meantime, stay happy, healthy, and safe!

~Sally~

Check in on your friends and family. Offering support is one of the best things that we can do to get them through difficult times. However, it can sometimes feel uncomfortable, daunting, or just plain awkward. The Roadmap to Friends Supporting Friends gives ideas on what support can look like, how to offer support, and where to begin.

Having conversations around mental health can sometimes be uncomfortable, but it can also make a big difference. Not sure where to start? Check out these tips and tools from Seize the Awkward to help you start the conversation and what to do during and after the conversation.

If someone you know is struggling emotionally or having a hard time, you matter and can be the difference in getting them the help that they need. The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline has resources on what to look for and how you can help them.

Check in on your friends and family. If you notice someone is behaving differently or seems distressed, do not be afraid to ask if they are struggling or having thoughts about suicide. Talking openly about mental health and suicide can help create an honest conversation and connection.

Stay happy, healthy, and safe! ~Sally~